In 1978, Meryl Streep seemed to have everything ahead of her. At just 29, she was earning attention as one of the most promising actresses of her generation and landing roles that would soon make her a star.
But while her career was taking off, her personal life was falling apart. The man she loved was dying. What followed was a heartbreaking chapter that would leave a lasting mark on Streep.
Meryl Streep Found A Love Unlike Any Other
When Meryl Streep met John Cazale during a 1976 production of ‘Measure for Measure‘ in Central Park, she had never met anyone quite like him. Cazale was already admired throughout the acting world. Not surprisingly, Streep quickly fell for him. The attraction was mutual, and those around them noticed it almost immediately. Actor Marvin Starkman later recalled that once Cazale joined the production, “the only thing he talked about was her.”
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Meanwhile, Streep was drawn to qualities that set him apart from everyone she had known before. Years later, she explained, “He wasn’t like anybody I’d ever met. It was the specificity of him, and his sort of humanity and his curiosity about people, his compassion.” As their relationship deepened, the couple built a life together in New York’s theater community. Friends often described them as an unusual match, yet their connection was undeniable.
Before long, they were living together and had become one of the most admired couples in the industry. At a time when both were pursuing their artistic dreams, it seemed as though they had a bright future ahead of them.
Everything Changed With One Diagnosis
Unfortunately, their dream future was suddenly thrown into doubt in May 1977. While appearing in previews for ‘Agamemnon‘, Cazale began feeling unwell and missed several performances. Concerned about his health, producer Joe Papp arranged for him to see a doctor. Within days, Cazale and Streep received devastating news. He had terminal lung cancer, and it had already spread throughout his body.
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The diagnosis left everyone stunned. Gail Papp later described the feeling as being “like you’ve been struck dead on the spot.” Even so, Streep refused to let despair take over. According to biographer Michael Schulman, after a brief silence, she looked up and asked, “So, where should we go to dinner?“
In that moment, she chose hope over fear. From then on, Streep stood firmly by Cazale’s side. While continuing to work, she devoted herself to caring for him and helping him maintain a sense of normalcy. Christopher Lloyd later remembered, “She had a kind of tough love about it. She didn’t let him malinger.” Rather than focusing on what might happen, she focused on making the most of the time they still had together.
Meanwhile, Cazale remained determined to keep acting. When he was cast in ‘The Deer Hunter‘, studio executives worried about the risks of employing a terminally ill actor. Nevertheless, the filmmakers fought to keep him in the project. Streep also accepted a role in the film, largely because it allowed her to stay close to him during a period when every moment together mattered.
Cazale’s Death Left A Lasting Mark On Her Life
As Cazale’s condition worsened, Streep faced an increasingly difficult balancing act between work and love. Although she later took a role in the television miniseries ‘Holocaust‘ for financial reasons, being away from him proved emotionally exhausting. The production kept her in Austria for months longer than expected, and every extra day felt like time stolen from the person she loved most. Looking back, she admitted, “I was going crazy. John was sick, and I wanted to be with him.”
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As soon as filming wrapped, she rushed back to New York and devoted herself entirely to his care. For months, the couple retreated from public life as Cazale underwent treatments and his health steadily declined. Throughout it all, Streep rarely revealed her fears to others. Yet in a letter to her former Yale drama teacher, she offered a glimpse into her private struggle. “I am worried all the time and pretending to be cheery all the time, which is more exhausting mentally physically emotionally than any work I’ve ever done,” she wrote.
By early March 1978, Cazale had entered Memorial Sloan Kettering Hospital. Streep never left his side. Then, on March 12, doctors informed her that he was gone. According to Schulman, Cazale briefly opened his eyes one final time and softly told her, “It’s all right, Meryl. It’s all right.” Moments later, he died. Afterward, Streep called his brother and tearfully said, “I tried.”
Although Streep’s career soared in the years that followed, those closest to her believed that losing Cazale changed her forever. The experience deepened her understanding of love, sacrifice, and devotion. As a result, the tragedy became part of the emotional foundation she carried into her life and work.
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